Fund Consumerium: Difference between revisions

19 bytes removed ,  27 August 2005
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Help '''fund [[Consumerium itself|Consumerium]]'''!
Help '''fund [[Consumerium itself|Consumerium]]'''!


[[On this page]] [[we]] are developing a case to fund [[Consumerium itself]] for big bucks:
On this page we are developing a case to fund [[Consumerium itself]] for big bucks:


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[[Dear donor]],
Dear donor,


[[We, trolls]], have created a specification for the ultimate weapon for [[fair trade]]:  a [[healthy buying infrastructure]] that will instantly tell consumers the moral implications and [[comprehensive outcome]]s of their buying decisions.  No one will have any excuse to buy from those who violate their values, anyone can verify whether someone actually follows their own beliefs, simply by scanning their shopping cart.  It is a revolution in human rights, in environmental responsibility, and in [[sustainability]].  It is the future!
[[We, trolls]], have created a specification for the ultimate weapon for [[fair trade]]:  a [[healthy buying infrastructure]] that will instantly tell consumers the moral implications and [[comprehensive outcome]]s of their buying decisions.  No one will have any excuse to buy from those who violate their values, anyone can verify whether someone actually follows their own beliefs, simply by scanning their shopping cart.  It is a revolution in human rights, in environmental responsibility, and in [[sustainability]].  It is the future!


[[We, trolls]], despite despising humans sometimes and wishing to [[bite you on the leg]], have set aside our disdain so as to provide you with an ultimate weapon for truth and justice.  Not since we (not dwarves as some have claimed) forged [[Mjolnir]] for Thor, or our great troll hero [[Rumpelstiltskin]] spun straw into gold, has such a weapon come from trolls to be handed to humans.  Now you must fund it, or, you must see it go only to trolls for troll uses, foul and underhanded though those may be.  Without your human "money" to steer and influence the project, it will likely become a [[trollist]] effort to eradicate [[sysop power structure]] to the exclusion of all other purposes.   
[[We, trolls]], despite despising humans sometimes and wishing to [[bite you on the leg]], have set aside our disdain so as to provide you with an ultimate weapon for truth and justice.  Not since we (not dwarves as some have claimed) forged Mjolnir for Thor, or our great troll hero Rumpelstiltskin spun straw into gold, has such a weapon come from trolls to be handed to humans.  Now you must fund it, or, you must see it go only to trolls for troll uses, foul and underhanded though those may be.  Without your human "money" to steer and influence the project, it will likely become a [[trollist]] effort to eradicate [[sysop power structure]] to the exclusion of all other purposes.   


[[We, trolls]], give you a final chance to fund it for big bucks so that it can pursue its original purpose, that is, [[trolling]] corporations who behave badly, and causing them to change their practices and apologize for their behaviour, publicly and in the most humiliating way.  Humans, we give you this one final chance to admit that you are in fact [[trolls]], and that all of us together must begin to [[troll corporation]]s that are destroying our planet.
[[We, trolls]], give you a final chance to fund it for big bucks so that it can pursue its original purpose, that is, [[trolling]] corporations who behave badly, and causing them to change their practices and apologize for their behaviour, publicly and in the most humiliating way.  Humans, we give you this one final chance to admit that you are in fact [[trolls]], and that all of us together must begin to [[troll corporation]]s that are destroying our planet.
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- the trolls
- the trolls
[[Category:Humor]]
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